Extremely, extremely slack…and this is why

I have been very slack with the old blog lately, and it is because I have not had two moments to rub together over the last several weeks.

In the last few weeks, we have:

• Cleaned the cr*p and junk out of our house
• Prepared for removalists
• Travelled to Sydney to find an apartment
• Found above apartment, after much walking, pain, torture, exposure to the worst apartments in the world, and crying.
• Had our home packed up by three hilarious men, all of which have now seen my underwear collection, as they packed all of my belongings.
• Dropped our car with a company who will truck it over to Sydney
• Moved into my mum’s house
• Lived out of suitcases (still currently doing)
• Had a big goodbye BBQ
• Welcomed a brother back from Europe
• Had several mini break downs
• Had several little fights which we have simply dismissed due to our current stress levels
• Completed ridiculous amounts of design work in between all of the above

We are flying out in 2 days! We have reached the goodbye stages, which I am never good at. I am actually a little worried as I haven’t had a good bawl about leaving yet, and I am worried that when it hits I may not walk for days afterwards.

Stitch & B*tch

I wonder if this is what happens to my mum's sowing group when they go down south for their stitch and b*tch weekends? A bit OCD, but that' cool, I can relate to that, plus it's great animation.

Click here to see what I mean.

Ok…so we are moving to Sydney!

My un-employed husband is no longer un-employed! Oh yes, that’s right! My days of coming home to my househusband are almost over! Of course before I get to experience a workingman again, we have to pack up our entire lives and move to Sydney…small sacrifice! Haa haa, not really.

We got confirmation on Wednesday, and we have almost cleared out all the unwanted cr*p from our unit, which has been a really cleansing experience. I recommend that everyone imagine that they are moving interstate and cull all their cr*p so they can feel as cleansed as I do right now. I feel freed, from all of the useless papers, collected postcards, dusty books, old candles, teenage clothing (yes I am 24 and still had a huge box of teenage clothing). It is really amazing how much stuff really means nothing to our lives, yet we all seem to carry it around with us. I never thought of myself as much of a hoarder, I always do a twice-yearly sort and throw, but I have held on to so much useless, ugly, trashy things, all of which I actually disliked but felt compelled to keep.

This week we will have all of our stuff packed, loaded and trucked and will move in with my Mumma, and we will go to Sydney to look at apartments next weekend.

It is all happening so quickly, all of this change. Which is not necessarily a bad thing, as it has forced us to make quick decisions and not over think things too much. My only concern is that after about a month of being there that it will all hit us, and we will get a bit homesick and lonely. We will have each other, and some of my family also. But once we settle in, I think it will hit us that this is a really big change.

Two in one day! Now aren't you Lucky!

Last week I did a wander in Freo near my office and took some shots with my little digi camera, here they are.

Commitment Lacking

Ok, so I know I have not been super committed to this site in the last week. Many apologies. I have just been up to my ear lobes in work and stress.

Please however to go and enjoy these latest photo's on Flickr. I have finally uploaded the photos from my joint b'day Karaoke sesh, and very soon there will be some nice arty shots of Freo.

Prep for the 1st Baby Shower

On Saturday I am going to attend my first baby shower, for a girlfriend of mine. She is an absolute doll, and I am sooo excited about going to the shower (and about the baby of course). So yesterday, in preparation I went out to buy her a gift. I was going to get her all the Bunnikins gear, you know the ceramic bowl, double handled cup, spoon with the handle, all that sorta junk. This was the traditional gift in my family for babies. But then I made the huuugggee mistake, and just let me emphasise huuugggee mistake of going into a really funky baby shop in South Perth, and came out with a couple of other items which do not match the previous description…at all! I still really want to get the Bunnikins stuff but now I can’t afford to get that too!

I swear to god, that no woman over the age of 21 should be allowed inside a baby shop! No way, hoossaay! Especially not in Spring! I was like a kid in a candy store! There were cute dresses, jumpsuits, giant rubber ducky’s, booties, hats, cool t-shirts with “Got Milk” written on them. How were the Bunnikins ever going to compete with that? They just didn’t stand a chance. I wanted to buy everything in there, and I mean everything!

I got home with a huge bag containing two expertly wrapped gifts and the cutest card ever (!) for my friend and her future daughter. The first thing I said to my husband was that under no circumstances was he to allow me near that shop again, especially when we eventually pop out our own watermelons. Because I swear, if I go there again, I will spend every cent we have, and don’t have (on credit) in that shop, till there is absolutely nothing cute left in there.

I must admit, I might even have to hold him back too, cause when I told him about the Got Milk baby t-shirt he just about ran for the keys and the car to go down there and buy it. But I mean who wouldn’t? That’s funny sh*t!

Anxiety

I think I may have just had an anxiety attack or something?! I started freaking out, breathing really fast, feeling that all was hopeless, very fidgety, very agitated, and couldn’t even sit down until I had washed the dishes, scrubbed the stove top, and dusted the entire house! What does it all mean? And why?

Well, my husband has been unemployed for almost two months now, he left his old job and had a bit of a well-deserved holiday, he hadn’t had one in three years except for our honeymoon. So in this period he has had several interviews, one has progressed really well, and we are at the stage where huge hints have been dropped, but there is no actual approval as to when he is going to get it. We were supposed to find out yesterday, but the guy in charge was away on business, then today but he has been in meetings, and now time wise it is too late for them to call us today. So we won’t find out till tomorrow.

I know this shouldn’t be a big deal but the potential new job could mean a move for us that would be quite significant, that might develop quite quickly, the idea of which is making every muscle in my body tightens up, including my date. (Too much information I know, but I am really trying to communicate just how stressed I am feeling by this whole situation of uncertainty). I am not stressed by the fact that we have to move, but by the fact that we ‘almost’ ‘maybe’ ‘might’ have to. I am one of those people who need to know either way. I don’t deal well with uncertainty.

Another thing I am not good at is patience. Whenever I have needed something, I have always just gone out and got it, and I have made it happen pretty quickly. But our current situation is something that I can’t rush and I can’t force. And that…that is what is shitting me! In my head I am thinking why don’t they just hurry up and call us already, and put us out of our misery! Maybe if they knew that I was feeling so uptight they might hurry the f*ck up! (Haa haa, I doubt it, very much).

So now that I have had my rant, removed every speck of dust from my home, and my stove is sparkling like an f-ing 3 carat diamond, I am finally feeling a little better. I have decided that in order to cope, I am not going to think about the job, the possible move, or anything to do with that situation, it’s not happening until it’s happening. So no body, I repeat NOBODY bring it up, and if I do, stop me…please…for the preservation of my sanity and the environment which I am fast filling up with disposable anti-static dusting cloths.

Of course this whole ignorance is bliss scenario will go down the toilet when we go for dinner tonight at the in-laws and they ask about the job. “Has he got it, has he not got it, when will you know, maybe he hasn’t, where will you live, what will you do with your job?” Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh! Help!

Pink for Breast Cancer Awareness Month

I may yet find a better picture to put at the top left for this Pink month. But I thought it was important to mention that this month is Breat Cancer Awareness Month. That is also why some of the parts of my site are pink, mainly the text for now, as Blogger is a little inflexible with colour changes. :)

Have a look at these sites to see how you can contribute or raise awareness for Breast Cancer in your area;

National Breast Cancer Foundation

Pink Ribbon

Cheers
Bec

Bubble Wrap is the Bomb

This is the coolest! Must have more!!!!

Lotto hopes dashed…every other week

When the lotto prize reaches above about 9 million dollars, my husband HAS to buy a lotto ticket. After he has bought one, or I have bought one for him, he then sits down and proceeds to list all the things we can do when we win the lotto. Like first we will go on a holiday, then we will buy a house, a new car, take the family to China for the Olympics. All good stuff! The thing is that I have never really been into the lotto; my family aren’t big lotto ticket people. Hence I don’t really see the excitement in buying a piece of paper for 10-15 dollars and then hoping, that out of the millions of people who have also bought a ticket that we will win. Maybe I am a realist but I don’t really think that the chances of winning are that high, at all! But as he says, you have to be in it to win it!

After our discussion of all the cool stuff that we will buy, do and experience I must admit that I do get a bit excited. But I always have to pull myself back to reality and think hang on a sec, this is the lotto, the chances of winning anything are extremely low. After this discussion, I always feel like maybe our current lifestyle is not really good enough. L In reality it is! We are doing great for people in our early/mid twenties, we have minimal debt apart from our giant HECS debts, we own lots of shares, and we studied hard to get good jobs that we love doing, we are married and we are happy! What’s better than that? Well maybe a slightly higher salary would be nice, but we don’t really need to win lotto.

Last year I bought a lotto ticket for us and I won $40 (not much), but the next week I won $120. I caught the bug after that, but only for a week. I bought a ticket the week after that and then we won nothing. See I am happy to be committed to something as long as it is committed to me also! And Lotto YOU FAILED ME!

The only upside to buying a ticket for me is that at least I know I am contributing money to Lottery West. My hard earned Lotto ticket money is helping a lot of charities and community projects, which are funded by Lotto grants. Apart from the extremely distant possibility of winning, the fact that we are donating to a body that makes a difference in this community is the only reason I allow the hubby to keep buying them tickets.

Happy 100th Post!

Hello Peeps,

Happy 100th post! December last year I wrote my first post, and wondered whether it would be a good idea to even go down this path. But I have found this blog a huge release for frustrations, funny bits, questioning myself, and expelling some of my crazy into the world without creating irreparable damage.

So Happy 100th post and please enjoy the latest photos that I have posted on Flickr, preview on the right! See the rest here.

Cheers
Bec

Serial Email Forwarders

I don’t know if ‘Forwarders’ is even a word, and I don’t know if you can tell that this is going to be a rant, about people who only send forwards instead of putting thought into writing something of actual use!

It was over 8 years ago that I received my first forward, initially they were a bit of fun, but it did not take long for the novelty to wear off! When you first got internet or email you were so excited that you actually had an email whether it was a forward or not, though after a little while you came to realise that the people sending them couldn’t actually be bothered writing you a proper email. Instead they sent you an email full of someone else’s photos, poems, warm fuzzy’s etc. Like that is supposed to make you feel good?! (*hands currently making obscene gestures*)

I actually have people who only send me forwards, no normal emails. No “Hi, how are you going? This is what I have been up to…”, only forwards, I repeat, ONLY FORWARDS! Am I not worthy of an actual email containing the contents of their own heads? I think this is the major reason that I hate forwards, they are sent instead of actual intelligent conversation. Imagine if we spammed each other in person! It would be like someone asking you how your day was, and then you sprouting information about a completely unrelated topic about someone else, or something else, along with some pictures of a dog hugging a cat. What would be funny is if you used those crappy forward quizzes to actually find out more about people in person! Even with people that you already know! “Hi, I have known you for years but what is your favourite ice cream flavour, what was the name of your first pet, and like, what are your four favourite movies of all time?!”

Mmm, are you all dying from the saturation of sarcasm in this post?

See, the thing is, that I see forwards like junk mail now, I pick it up from my letterbox and I stick it directly into the recycling bin, it doesn’t even make it into the house. If I see any email with fw: in front of it, you can be sure that I will delete, delete, and delete. Because they are useless trash, especially the ones with funny photos that I have seen a million times, or came out about 3 years go. Often the initiators of the forwards will only catch on about three years after something has first graced the internet.

After all that ranting, if a forwarded email does make it through, and I do open it, if it is good, I will still not forward it. Unless it is really, really really good (does not happen often), then I will write a short introduction, delete all of the crappy previous addresses that the email has been forwarded to, and personalise the email for the select few I am forwarding to.

This brings me to Forwarding Etiquette. If you cannot resist that urge inside you to forward, here are some useful tips for making your habit less dangerous to others:

• Do not, I repeat, DO NOT forward crap forwards (this should bring you down to about the two worthy forward emails a year).

• Do not forward those crap quizzes. They are long, boring and no one has time to do them. If you really think that you need to know more about your friends/family, call them on the phone and ask them questions, it’s quicker and more fun.

• Do not just hit forward and leave 2000 lines of other people’s email addresses above the forward! Delete all but the essential information before you hit send. This way people will not have to scroll for ten minutes before they actually reach the forwarded contents, along the way being greeted by people’s “Haa Haa’s” and “Hee Hee’s‘.

• Edit the top of the forward to meet and greet the people that you are sending it to, so they at least feel slightly like they are worthy of your words.

• Do not select everyone in your address book and send the forward to them all. Believe me, your Grammy does not want to see the rude cartoons, and your macho hormonal brother does not want to see pictures of kittens.

• Do not forward emails with explicit content to people’s work emails, unless you want to get them fired.

Aaah, I feel better already, all prepped to move forward into my email ‘fw:’ free, though inevitably with a letterbox full of junk mail.

This make my ovaries turn

Dooce's Wednesday entry makes my ovaries turn over see it here.

Cheeseburger & Black Beetle Equals Eeewwww!

(Warning: if you are offended by people using the Lord's name in vain, do not read this post. Also if you don't like insects any where near cheeseburgers.)

Person A
Hey guess what?
I have the grossest story.
Trauma central!
I was at the gym Tuesday night, and I just changed into my exercise gear that I got off the line that morning. Anyway, all of a sudden, I feel this sting in my undies

Person B
Jesus!!

Person A
I rushed to the toilet and there was a HUGE black beetle biting me!
I freaked!

Person B
Holy sh*t!

Person A
Almost vomited

Person B
Was it in your hamburger???
LOL
You know what I mean by hamburger right??

Person A
Haa haa haa, you're funny, and yes!
I was traumatised!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Person B
Oh my god!!!!!

Person A
I got shivers, up my spine.

Person B
That’s horrible!! I would have died!!!!

Person A
It must have come in from off the line.

Person B
I had a bug in my hair near my forehead today and I freaked
Ooops its actually cheeseburger, care of dooce:

“Most Anticipated Moment of 2003: When the ultrasound technician pointed at the monitor and said, “See that cheeseburger? That means it’s a girl.”

“My husband’s most memorable quote of 2003: “You’re going to have to teach our daughter about her cheeseburger.”

Person A
Haa haa haa haa haa haa haa aha, cheeseburger, haa haa haa.

Person B
Lol, cause it looks like a cheeseburger!

Person A
Oh my god, man, beetles freak me out!
I couldn't believe it.
I get chills just thinking about it.

Person B
You are going to have a whole cheeseburger/beetle complex now.
That sh*t is scary!
I would have cried.

Person A
Yeah, I almost dry retched

Person B
Oh god, that’s horrible, you poor thing. You will be scarred for life.

Person A
Oh well.

Pike'in It Up

http://www.joshpyke.com/

Check this guy out, awesome tunes! The Middle of the Hill reminds me of when I was a kid, such a great collection of childhood memories, you can watch the video at this link. :)

Retraction

Just after my birthday I received a lovely birthday card, which I wrote about on this site. The card was from my Dad. In the card my Dad mentioned that I was entering into my 25th year. After I saw the 25, my initial reaction was to jump to the conclusion that he thought I was 25, after re-reading the card at a later date I realised that this wasn’t the case at all. Just that I was entering my 25th year, which actually is CORRECT!

Initially I didn’t bother writing a retraction about the 25 hoo haa, as no one in my family was reading my site. Until I foolishly thought that I could trust my 16 year old brothers. (*Note to Self: you love your brothers but they are not yet capable of keeping all of the secrets you might like them to) I just had a panicked call from my good ole Dad, saying that he was so sorry that I thought, that he thought that I was 25! He thought that I was offended because my Bro’s told him I had written about it on this site, which I had, but hadn’t corrected myself, until now.

So I stand corrected:
My Dad does not think I am 25
My brothers aren’t capable of keeping secrets just yet, but that is only natural for 16-year-old boys who get excited when they are telling stories!

And:
Many more people now know about my website than I had initially anticipated, but I suppose that I am comfortable with that. After all, one of the reasons I started writing was so that people would read, why else would you publish written works on the Internet!

Welcome to the era of the public blog, these are exciting times! Like Dooce and many who have come before me, I have managed to upset someone close to me, my good ole Dad, who is a fantastic card writer, Volvo driver and loving and concerned parent.

Sorry Dad, love you Dad and loved your card.

“I love you fart mouth”

Wife: I love you friend
Husband: Whoa, bad breath
Wife: Sorry
Husband: You ate eggs again didn’t you?
Wife: Yeh, for lunch, on toast.
Husband: When you eat eggs, and then breath on me its like you are farting in my face!
Wife: Mmm I love eggs.
Husband: Mmm I don’t like farts.
Wife: I love you friend
Husband: I love you fart mouth.

Spring is in the air, and my ovaries are alert!

I am sitting in a new café in South Perth, its sunny, and its spring. Finally! Spring is here! Yay! My ovaries are in over-drive as around me because all around me are pretty mummy’s and their baby’s/toddlers in the café, all taking their kids to the live play school show on a few blocks from here. D*mn you ovaries,! I am not ready for those urges. I am only 24! Though at 24 my mum has at least one child, possibly with the second on the way, aah the good old olden days, when getting married and popping out young-uns was the key to every woman’s success.

It will be 25 degrees today, sunny and perfect! Gotta love that time of the year when you can pop your washing out on the line and it’s dry in under an hour. Oh dear, did I just relate the beauty of spring to the fact that I can create maximum efficiency in my washing schedule?! I did…and one, two, three, I have turned into my mother. Although her ability to multi-task is something that everyone should aspire to.

So back to these spring ovarian motions. I always get freaked out when I see little kids, and I go oooh aaah. Because my brain is saying NOOOOO and my ovaries are saying YYEEESSS. What is it with this urge to procreate? It must be deeply imbedded in a woman’s psyche. I have heard rumours that a breastfeeding mothers actually get milk leakage from their br**sts when they see babies???!!!! Maybe I got that wrong, will have to Google it and confirm when I have more time.

I just wish I could switch the ovaries off for a while, till my brain has caught up with them. Its like looking at a car crash when I see little kids, you don’t want to look, but you can’t look away! You can’t stop yourself from looking at their little outfits, and their little shoes, and their little hands, little feet, big eyes. Oh Jesus, there I go again! Ovaries! Now you listen here! I am just not ready!

My Hermit Neighbour

We have been living in our little unit for close to two years now and most of our neighbours we know, or at least wave to. Two of them even gave us cards when we got married. There is one neighbour in particular however who is like a hermit or something. She lives directly next door to us and I have seen her ONCE (yes really!), reversing out her driveway about 15 months ago, and since then, nothing.

The only reason I used to know that she existed was that her car would sometimes not be in the driveway, and then sometimes it would. Then it dawned on me that she must be a shift worker who works odd hours and that was why we never saw her. Problem solvered I thought!

About 5 months ago around the time we got married, the garden began to look a little shabby, and her ugly metal roller shuttered windows were always closed, and the car, it stared to stay permanently in the carport. I also started to get paid visits by her rather shabby looking cat, who sleeps in my garden beds, and mopes around my garden. The poor thing look decidedly underfed, its fur is really matted, and it looks severely underweight. It is from about that time on that we have come to know her as our strange hermit neighbour.

I also noticed that the only visitor she seemed to get was a green Hyundai Excel on Friday evenings, and sometimes on the weekend. It turns up and a decidedly butch looking lady gets out of it, and waddles inside. Now my husband and I have bets on whether our hermit neighbour will get a visit from her l*sbian lover or not each weekend. Cruel I know, but we are cruel, heartless w*nkers so it fits.

More recently the garden has turned into a forest of waist high weeds, in fact some of them are probably higher than my head (which is not hard, considering I am almost the shortest person in the world). There are also weeds in the driveway, also waist high, growing from in between the bricks. They seem to have grown around the car also, the navy blue Holden Astra is almost enveloped by weeds. So I am guessing that she hasn’t actually left the house in say, 4-5 months.

We got a sign of life (not her life though) two days ago, when several of her friends came to her house, three cars to be exact and hauled some crap onto the lawn for the suburbs junk collection, happening next week. Gave us an insight into the inside of her hermit zone, a white wooden bed head with a gold antique strip, and a queen size mattress in hippy green. Wow, what does it all mean? Nothing I expect.

Mmm, its funny how curious we are as humans, all I want to know right now is what the heck is going on there? What’s with the metal roller shutters that block out all the light, the whole not coming outside thing, the whole not feeding your cat properly thing, not bringing your bins in after they are emptied, like ever???!!!

I have been tempted to go and knock on the door with some baked goods or something, to make sure that she is ok. But there is always that constant toss up, would she really want that, would she latch on to me afterwards, would that be so bad, would I be doing it only the satisfy my curiosity. It’s a tough one, and until I take that leap, she will continue to be my strange hermit neighbour.

Aaah Haa Haa Haa Haa

I want a puppy!

http://www.dooce.com/archives/daily/09_12_2006.html

P.S I tried to make this an actual link for you but the New Beta Blogger version is for some reason having a hissy fit! It's one of those love/hate blogger days.