My Dad thinks I am 25

I got birthday cards from various family members and friends on my birthday, I always love getting cards, especially when people write interesting messages, better than the usual “Happy Birthday, have a great day!” Yawn! Boring!

My Dad is particularly good at this, he always writes great things in our cards, and this year it was no different. Except that instead of saying 24 it said 25. Now either Dad is thinking that I was alive 9 months before I was born so I am almost 25 (if you count the months in the womb) or worse…he thinks I am 25!

I am ready for 24. I am just not ready for 25, that’s five years from 30! I am just not ready for that! My husband is 26, so he is already on the down wards slide towards 30, but he has dealt with it very well, well he hasn’t mentioned any concerns. When I get to closer to 25 then I probably will become more prepared for it, but I have only just prepared myself for the two teamed with the four.

Dad was sitting right next to me when I read the card, and I didn’t have the heart to tell him that he got my age wrong, seeing that he had put so much effort into the message. So I just closed it quickly before my husband could read the “25” and comment, and said “Oh Dad! That’s really great! Thanks!”

Aaah, the things we do to protect the people we love, by lying to them and protecting them from themselves.

I did eventually show my husband the card (after Dad left) and his response was “Oh Baby. He just thinks your 25 cause your old now.” Gee, thanks for the encouragement.

24 Yesterday

Some nice things I got for my birthday:
Orchids
Scones with Jam and Cream
Fresh Muffins
Coffee
Boiled Eggs on Toast
Monaaayyyy
Little Black Dress
Chocolate
Cards
Cake
Spagghi's Dinner

(Recurring theme: food)

See birthday pics here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/berecca1982/

Go the Fro

On Saturday night I went to an excellent Hens night. The theme was “Crazy Hair” and since I like to excel at everything, I decided that the only way to go, was to go, ‘The Fro’.

Boy, was it a good idea! The response from the surrounding patrons and guests on ‘The Fro’ was so positive I am actually thinking about wearing it out regularly. Everyone I walked past, and met automatically reacted positively. I lost count of all the “I love your Hair!”, comments. It was great! “The Fro” was a real conversation starter.

I must say that myself, and my good friend, were the only two really truly committed to the Crazy Hair Theme. She wore a Tina Turner wig, which was absolutely fabulous. It was even more fabulous when she sang Tina Turner at the Karaoke bar.

Aaah, wine, fro, corona, more fro, more wine, champagne, mango midori slushy’s, even more fro, Tina Turner Wig and karaoke. What more could you want in a good night out?

P.S You can see a picture of 'The Fro' and I here:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/berecca1982/221035547/

Unfortunatley Blogger has decided to be a b*tch and not let me upload photos! Blogger and I have a love/hate relationship. It loves me, I love it only when it doesn't crash my web browser, all the other times, I hate it! It only seems to let me upload giant mushrooms. Of which I have more pictures of, as I bought another giant mushroom on Saturday. This one fed 6 people! Two of them teenage boys! That was one mutha of a mushroom!

Next holiday, we are totally going to Argentina

I thought that you all might like to share in the hilarity of Mighty Girl. This restaurant sounds hilarious, I would love to go there with all of my girlfriends, get pi*sed and giggle for hours on end.

http://mightygirl.com/2006/08/09/muppets-xxx/

Hardest working dog on the Internet

Haa haa haa, check this out;

http://www.dooce.com/archives/daily/08_16_2006.html

Wife of an Un-employed Man

My husband is un-employed, what fun! No really, it’s not that bad, he finished his last job Friday last week, and he has 2 months of paid leave to find something new. With his experience and all round excellence I have no doubt that he will land something new asap!

In the mean time I must say that I am enjoying all of the pampering, the cleaning and the bacon and eggs for breakfast! After my daily dose of 1.5 hours of Yoga I come home to fresh juice, fresh coffee and eggs and bacon on toast, perhaps not as good for the waistline as the taste buds. I must admit that after a long day at work I love the fact that I can come home to my husband wearing an apron. It’s sexy! Though he hasn’t worn the apron naked yet (*frowning with disappointment).

It is strange though, to feel uncertainty about the future, it must be even scarier for my husband than it is for me. At least I know that I am earning money, he isn’t even sure that he will have that in the next few weeks, Thank God he never took a holiday in 3 years, otherwise right now, we would be absolutely stuffed, literally stuffed with unpaid bills (we would both have to sell ourselves on the street).

We had a very in depth discussion a few weeks ago and decided that when looking for a new job we weren’t going to limit him to Perth only, or even Australia only. Which is kind of scary, because it means that potentially within 2 months we could be anywhere in the world! I know that sounds very exciting, but the downer for me is that my husband would jet set off to set up our new home, and I would be stuck here for several months working and packing up all of our crap, of which we have much!

Today I worked from home, which I often do (as a self employed designer) and my husband was at home as well (being un-employed!). I must admit, the breakfast was great but after that I wanted him to leave! He kept running in and out of the room hugging me, and I was trying to concentrate on an annual report, a brochure and a corporate identity! It was like he wanted me to be un-employed with him, but little did he know, that someone around here has to do some work! Ok, now I am just being mean. It was nice to have someone make me an afternoon Milo, and a shoulder massage when I reached my 3pm low, and msn me from the study and tell me I’m pretty, even after I have been whining Ben Harper and Tori Amos tunes all afternoon.

Foot/Butt Update

"This pose is going to be challenging for many of you, it really opens up the hip joint here (points to spot on hip), effectively what you are doing is digging your heel into your anus."

- Yoga Instructor

The day my Yoga instructor taught me to put my foot up my ar*e.

Last Monday I started an intensive 2 weeks Yoga course to get myself back into the swing of Yoga, after being a gym junkie for the past year. On the first day I almost fainted in class, and felt extremely ill, though that could have been to do with the period attack I was experiencing. After the near fainting Yoga has been fine, and my body is beginning to feel alive again.

Yoga has the amazing ability to awaken muscles that you didn’t even know existed and put you into positions that you never thought you could be in. A fine example of this arose yesterday, when our Yoga instructor taught us to sit on our own foot, effectively forcing our heel into our a-holes. It was an interesting experience, and one that I got to try again today. I thought that perhaps I would be more comfortable the second time round, but I wasn’t. It appears that I have no way near enough padding in that lower region, which means that my sitting bones dig into my ankle and my foot dogs into my ar*ehole.

I must say, I am not really looking forward to that pose tomorrow.

Another interesting point (poise yourself for a rant), the instructor actually told me that I was lazy (maybe he said it is jest, I don’t know) for not contorting my body enough in order to link arms around my elastic band of a spine! I almost blurted out, “If I was lazy I would be in bed eating pizza and watching Sunrise, instead of the last week and a half of being here every week day, for an hour and a half sticking my foot up my ar*e!”

My body is rejecting my skin!

A couple of months ago I came up in a rash and skin dryness and loss, in my armpits. I got a cream from a crazy eastern European GP and it all went away, or so I thought! The rash did go away, but as soon as I stopped using the cream it came back, and then the other day I looked down at my poor old belly button and inside my belly button was the same rash! So I have started using the cream there too.

Today, my head was decidedly itchy, I had just washed my hair this morning so it was definitely clean. As I was scratching I saw these little snow flake pieces falling from my head! Could it be…NO! Not dandruff!!! F**k no!!! I have never had dandruff, my whole life! I don’t want to use those stinky poo anti-dandruff shampoos! I am quite happy using my lovely brunette enhancing shampoo that smell like lollies! This sucks!

I blame:
a) My Dad, he has dandruff it must be some weird hereditary thing that only starts when you are about to turn 24.
b) My husband, he has had dandruff all his adult life and has infected me with his dandruff disease when he shared his pillow…comb…towel…life!
c) The fancy new John Jardine shampoo that smells like lollies, that I have been using for the past few months. Good one! You have just lost a perfectly happy customer to Stinky Dandruff Pinetarsol Shampoos!!

So my body has decided to boycott my skin, “I have had enough of you skin” it says.
Am I being punished for over moisturising?

Hang on a tic…all of this started after I got married, that’s it! I am allergic to marriage…”Sorry baby, we have to go back to our de facto lifestyle, my body is physically rejecting our marriage” I wonder if anyone has tried that line before?

Well, if anyone has some good suggestions for me to keep the skin on my body, they would be much appreciated, as I don’t think skin falling off is going to pass as a good reason for an annulment. So far I have washed my hair with a bright blue shampoo with the consistency of Jiff, and Tea tree oil shampoo, neither are really working.

Tear Jerker…

If you are at work, and you are not wearing waterproof mascara, boycott this till you get home…don’t say I didn’t warn you.

My Dad was right when he said “It is the end of an Era”. On Monday night I cried myself to sleep, on Tuesday morning my Dad did everything he could do to put off what we had to do at 9am. So much that he was 15 minutes late to the vet.

On Tuesday morning we had to put down our beautiful Shadow. I have not been able to write about it till now, as I would have been bawling before now, right now I am teary. We had Shadow for half of my life, since I was 12 years old, I am turning 24 on the 22nd of this month. So he has been a part of our lives for almost 12 years. He has made our lives so rich, so fulfilling, and best of all he taught all of us kids to care deeply for another being. He was our brother.

When we went to choose our new puppy 12 years ago, there was this chubby little fluff ball at the bottom of the pile, just trying to get to us, but all the other puppies were climbing on him. I lifted him out of the pile, and gave him a huge cuddle, and the first thing he did was licked me square in the mouth. It was gross…but funny.

Our Dad bought Shadow for us as a joint present for Christmas, about 9 months after our parents decided to separate, it was a tough period for the four of us kids, and Shadow, he was the light of our lives.

When he was little he used to sleep on my bed (he wasn’t supposed to, he was meant to be on the floor, but how can you say no to a fluff ball? Huh? Huh?). He would sleep dead in the middle and push me out to the edges of the bed, at the time it was annoying, now it’s a great memory.

He was such a character. I would lay on the timber veranda when I was a kid, and just look at his face, and talk to him about how I was feeling, and how I was so sick of my parents behaving younger than me (I was 14). I know it sounds silly, but it felt like when I was fourteen, angry, wearing army pants and big black boots, that he was the only one who understood me (Shadow and the Smashing Pumpkins of course).

He sat by my feet when I was 22, and writing my honours thesis for hours and hours on end. He kept my feet warmer than any pair of ugg boots. He made me giggle. Even when I moved out of home, it felt like he was always there for me, and whenever I went over to Dad’s, there he was sitting on the park bench on the veranda, waiting for me. (If you can’t guess, I am bawling my eyes out right now, if you aren’t you are an icicle!)

So, Tuesday, it was the end of an era. Now it feels like there is a void, and I know it will be the same for each of my brothers, and for my Dad, who has cared for him so lovingly over these past few months, when Shadow has been operated on to remove his cancer, and lived through the pain of it growing back, and gradually taking over his body.

Putting Shadow down, was one of the hardest decisions that we had to make, harder than writing an honours thesis, harder than travelling overseas alone, harder than having your heart broken by a boy. I know that we did the best thing for him, and I know that wherever he is he will be missing us just as much.

Shadow…we love you.

McConaughey

Matthew McConaughey is so cute, that's all I am saying ... oki one more thing, his characters are not so smart, but they are cute...so very cute...

P.S I love my Husband

Taco Town You Saved Me from Boring Taco Hell

http://www.blurbomat.com/archives/2006/07/27/solo

Go here and watch the Taco Town goodness...gosh those yanks are funny buggers. :)

Parked in a puddle, which is more like a lake…

This morning it was pi**ing down here in Freo, so when I saw a lovely parking spot closer than the regular other side of the universe spots, I got very, very excited! If you have ever parked at the E-shed in Fremantle after Notre Dame students have invaded you will understand why. I reversed about 20 metres back to the spot, and then saw the giant puddle that encompassed about 3/4’s of it. Going in forward would have meant getting out and standing ankle deep in reverse drain material and water. So I backed in, but still managed to stand in material/water that covered 3cm on my boots, high enough to start seeping in the cracks (don’t tell anyone they were the leather boots I bought in Florence).

Now, many may think this was a stupid idea, to park in a giant puddle. But what do you do when you are faced with having to walk 500-600 metres less or get slightly damp feet? It was a tough decision, and despite my now, freezing cold feet, the likelihood that I will now get a cold, and that my husband will have no sympathy as I brought it on myself, well… I think it was definitely worth it. I only wish I had my camera so I could show you just how f-ing big the puddle was, I looked quite attractive tip-toeing really quickly through it like I was Jesus trying to walk on water.

Huge Shroom

I know your thinking, who gives a Sh*t its just a mushroom! But look how huge this bugger is!!!






And below the mushroom it made when chopped, enought for a dinner for 4!

Crusty, Old, Creepy

I work in a crusty old building in Fremantle, an area of Perth well known for its lovely old buildings. It’s one of the last places in Perth where development has not completely destroyed old architecture. I love old buildings, I have always lived in old houses, and I am used to their various funny mishaps and personality disorders.

This old building is really gorgeous with heaps of character, but also a little bit of weirdness. Apparently there was a guy pushed down the spiral stairs at the back of the building near the kitchen, and I always feel kind of freaked when I go down there. Even before anyone told me that it always felt strange walking down the corridor the that end of the building. Now I haven’t ever really believed in ghosts or spirits, but it is weird how strange a feeling you get down there. I once peered over the edge of the stairs and looked down at the spiral and I felt a weird cold sensation.

There is also this random room at the back of the building now that apparently has been rented out to some group therapy people, except there is never anyone here when I am, and the door is always ajar, and there I nothing in this 9x9 metre room except two chairs right in the middle facing each other, its creepy! The door blows open and closed all the time even though there is no breeze, could be the air pressure I suppose…anyway it’s creepy.

I love this building and I never feel unsafe here, but I always get such a weird vibe when I go down the back of the building, which is essential as the kitchen holds the ingredient to my coffee addiction.

I’ll post some photos in the next few days of the creepiness for you…

Not a weirdo…

This evening I stood in my lounge room for 10 minutes and stretched my arms up really really high…and around and around. It felt good, you know…to just have that moment, to swim in that moment and enjoy the stretch, and the release.

P.S No…I am not a weirdo, sometimes you just need to stretch, try it sometime.

The Perfect Morning in the New Andrews Household

Coffee
Juice
Fruit Platter
Soy and Linseed Toast
Ugg boots
The Weekend Australian
…and some great conversation (Zero 7 in the background)

This morning has been a dream!

P.S Today we have been married for three months…it’s heaven.

Hello All…

Please have a read of Mazen Kerbaj’s blog and official site.

He is a guy living in Beirut, Lebanon. He records his feeling and most recent artworks on his blog site:
http://mazenkerblog.blogspot.com/

He also has a site where he posts his recorded sounds and artworks.
http://www.kerbaj.com/

Mazen has chosen to remain in Beirut in the current environment of war and destruction, he has sent his ex wife and his son to Paris, other members of his family are still elsewhere in Beirut and Lebanon. His drawings are haunting, real, and confronting.

Enjoy and relfect…

I need to peeeeeeeeeeee

Tuesday was my first day back at work after a lovely long weekend with my girlfriends down south. So it was a bit of a struggle emotionally and physically. I had a bit to get through, but some work fell through and so on top of feeling tired, I also felt dejected. I got through the small amount of work required, and then things heated up, I had a briefing with one of my freelance providers and then headed of to have another briefing for more work with another design business. My day was looking up, the only problem that I had to traipse over to suburban hell-hole that I like to call the North Side of Perth! There is an ingrained sense of rivalry between the northern and southern suburbs of Perth, and being a southerner I could never live north of the river, and consequently dislike going there unless it involves a trip to the physio, Café 130, or to get a design job. You could say that I am a South Side Snob, and…you would be right! But it’s cool, at least I can admit it.

I managed the trip to the North Side quite well and landed in my destination right on time! The briefing was excellent, I got a heap more jobs, and I left happy and feeling upbeat. That was until I left the meeting place and realised that I needed fuel and that I had the sudden urge to pee. “It’s alright” I told myself, we are on a main road here, there will be a petrol station not far away and they will have a loo there. So I drove, and I drove, and I drove and I drove (I could keep saying that forever but it would still not encompass the amount that I drove), but still no petrol station. So I turned off into another road, which seemed bigger and more promising, and after about five minutes I came across a Woolies petrol station! Fantastic Fuel and Loo! Or so I thought…

So I filled up the car, and even bounced with excitement as I realised I could use my Woolies voucher to reduce my petrol price! See you Northerner’s have stolen all of the Woolies Petrol stations for yourselves, as I am pretty sure I have seen all of ONE of these South of the River! So I am filled with petrol, and urine, time to dispense of the second.

“Um, hey do you have a loo here?”
“No, sorry, we don’t”
“Riggghhhhttt, so how do you guys pee then?”
“Oh we go to that shopping centre over there, (pointing towards a speck in the distance) or that pub over there, (points in the other direction to a speck in the distance)”
“Ok, cool I will just pop over to one of those then. Great thanks for that”
“Oh hang on, it’s too late the shopping centre is closed”
“That’s cool, I’ll go to the pub”
“Oh and the pub’s not open yet.”
“Riiiggghhhttt! So how do you guys pee then?”
“We either wait for the pub to open or just pee round the back”
“Well I can’t really wait because you see;
(a) I have to pick up my husband from work in Applecross in like five minutes
(b) My bladder may burst any second (by this time am jiggling uncontrollably)
(c) I am a girl and the idea of having to squat in public, in suburbia, is not really appealing to me”
“Well, sorry”
(The poor guy is thinking by now, “get this psycho peeing b*tch out of here”.)
“That’s ok…not your fault. But you might want to approach your boss about putting some flipping toilets in”

You northerners have all the f-ing Woolies Petrol Stations and no f-ing public toilets! What is wrong with you people! We southerners just wouldn’t put up with a NO public toilet fiasco like that!

Faced with a near exploding bladder and a jiggling disorder that looked somewhat familiar to Parkinson’s (apologies in advance to all of those who are suffering from Parkinson’s, it is a horrible disease and I am a total b*tch for comparing it to me incessant need to pee) I bundle into the car and absolutely floor it down the road. I am right now supposed to be picking up my husband, and I am still 25 minutes away, in North Side Ar*e Crack no-where and I still need to pee. Deciding that I have the strength and will of a highly trained martial arts-man I zoom onto the Freeway and spend 25 minutes jiggling in my seat and driving through the Freeway traffic at a snails pace. Whilst trying to disguise my jiggling from other drivers, who by this stage have started wondering why this psycho is jiggling and swearing in her car next to them, and who have all have tripped their central locking in case she decides to jump ship into their car and murder them. I may not have murdered them, but if they had a loo I definitely would have bribed them with dried banana chips so that I could relieve myself asap!

By the time I get to my husbands work I am dying. Literally, I may have keeled over where I was standing, dead in a pool of pee. I called him from the front step of his office, begging him to buzz the door so I can run upstairs to the loo. He does so, or so he thinks, because the door won’t open! I am jiggling and thinking THE DOOR WON’T OPEN, THE DOOR WON’T OPEN! OH MY GOD, IT’S COMING, I CAN’T HOLD IT!!!!!!

I won’t share the rest of the details but I made it to the toilet, just, after almost bursting for over an hour. Let me tell you that I felt like I had reached Nirvana as I walked out of that restroom, life could not have been better. Lesson learnt here is, all you southerners out there, next time you decide to travel to the northern suburbs make sure you pack a toilet roll, and a trailer carrying your own porta potty. DO NOT expect that you will be able to find a toilet in a hurry!

Haa Haa Spam

Today I got yet another dodgy spam email in my hotmail inbox, which was from Hubby Can’t, with the subject line “Satisfy me anymore”.

Well honey if he can’t there is no way I can! I am a woman! Didn’t the female name in my email address give that away?

I have gotten some real corkers, but I am too afraid to post them here in case Blogger cuts me off again, like they did with my le**ian commentary. J

Stay tuned in the next few days for a little story about my awesome weekend away with meee ladies. I will write it when I have some brain power to devote to it!

priceless

A great joke that my mother in law sent over to me a while ago. You may have already read it, but if not enjoy. :)


Jack wakes up with a huge hangover the night after a business function.

He forces himself to open his eyes and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose!

Jack sits up in bed and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed.

Jack looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror and notices a note on the table:
"Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to go shopping - Love you!!"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "Son...what happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3 am, drunk and out of your mind. You broke the coffee table, puked in the hallway and got that black eye when you ran into the door."

So, why is everything in such perfect order, so clean, I have a rose and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"

His son replies, "Oh, THAT!...Mom dragged you to the bedroom and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, bitch, I'm married!!!".

Broken table - $200
Hot breakfast - $5
Red Rose bud - $3
Two aspirins - $0.25
Saying the right thing, at the right time... PRICELESS!

Bidding Farewell

Wife:
Seeya Bebe
I love you

Husband:
bye
have fun
NO BOYS!

Wife:
I will you too !
Haa Haa
I don’t want any other boys but you

Husband:
If I even suspect there are boys I’m having a h**ker party

Wife:
LOL, ok. It’s a deal

Husband:
Nice!
BRB, arranging hookers

Wife:
I don’t have any boys planned so no h**kers for you!!!!!

Husband:
Aww man

Wife:
love you..... bbbyyyyyeeee

Husband:
bye

Creative Stinky Pies

A night time conversation between Husband and Wife when they are in bed.

Husband:
How was your day?

Wife:
Fantastic, my conference was great, but I broke the coffee percolator jug.

Husband:
Oh no!

Wife:
Yeah, I know. I almost cried.

Husband:
Oh well, no more yummy coffee for us.

Wife:
Hang on a tic! I can use the jug from the old broken percolator?!

Husband:
Good Idea!

Wife:
I am a Creative Thinker.

Husband:
You are also a Creative Stinker!

Wife:
Thanks

Husband:
I really like what you have done with our bed while I was out! It’s so much more…how do you say Creative Stinky!

Wife:
Haa haa that rhymes with Design is Kinky!
Thanks, it was these little pies I had at my conference.

Husband:
Creative Stinky Pies

Flickr Album

I have recently signed up for a Flickr Album, so far there are only a few wedding shots on there, but the collection will grow. Have a look here at : http://www.flickr.com/photos/berecca1982/

The Trip of a Lifetime

Yesterday my brother and his girlfriend left for a 4 month trip around Europe! They are so excited and it was great to see them off at the airport the same way the family saw me off around 6 years ago, when I went overseas on my own 4-month trip. They are so much more organized than I was, I was a bit of a hippy with an old manual camera, a pair of well worn jeans, my supermarket food, and my lack of spending money. Alternatively they have heaps of savings, a brand new savvy camera, new luggage and a more extensive tour. Although I am sure that we will both have had by the end a fantastic, eye-opening trip.

Nothing can prepare you for a trip like this, you can never attempt to create in your mind a vision of what it will look like. Because when you get there you realise that there is a whole new word out there that you never could picture here in Perth. Europe is amazing, it’s huge, and it is full of absolute excitement and wonder for anyone who comes from this modest little city of Perth. We live in such isolation in this city, not at all like the eastern states of Australia, where you drive for a few hours you can be in a different city, here you have to drive for 3 days non-stop to get to another city! In Europe if you drove for 3 days non-stop you could visit several countries!

The best thing about being from somewhere so isolated and visiting such a densely populate area of the world, is that you find everything amazing and new. The age and the beauty of the culture, architecture and people are mind boggling. I saw Viking huts that were thousands of years old in Denmark, churches which have lived through the Reformation in Belguim, city’s that have been completely destroyed in World Wars in The Netherlands, and walls that the Romans built, the list goes on and on.

Mmm, I am so jealous…it makes me want to embark on another journey overseas, but then I realise that I have just embarked on a new journey here. My own business and new marriage! These are exciting time for us all! No matter what journey we are travelling on, overseas or in our modest little cities. J

To DO is to BE, or to BE is to DO?

Do you ever feel like you never get to spend quality time with your partner, or your family, or even your friends? Do you ever feel like even though you make time for people you are not even really in the moment as you are just thinking about all of the other meaningless cr*p that you have to do later, or tomorrow, or next week, or that major thing next year that requires planning?

I feel like I am a ship passing in the night past my husband at the moment, we rarely get to spend quality time together. I can’t remember the last time that we spent the whole day together, just being together, eating breakfast together, going for a walk together, just laying on the couch for hours together, not since our honeymoon probably. It is so depressing that we lives our lives so caught up in DOING instead of just BEING!

As young “successful” people we are always pushed to have the best job, the best home, the best cooking, the best relationship, the best social lives, the best at hoarding loot or killing enemies in a computer game. We even feel pressured to be readers, writers, artists, perfect daughters and sons, brothers and sister. We feel the need to help everyone around us, to solve everyone’s problems, to encourage everyone around us and try to keep ourselves motivated at the same time. These are all great things, which are all a lot of fun and some even rewarding. But when you look back and see all of the time that you spent DOING all of these things, ignoring the people close to you and not just BEING in the moment when all of these precious moments were taking place, all of them seem meaningless.

The hardest part is when you have this realisation but you can’t seem to slow yourself down, and you can’t seem to get others to see it as a problem and slow down too. Would we all be happier, less stressed, healthier, more functional as human beings? I know that I would be all of these things if I could just learn to shut down the very dominant side of me that can’t help but DO DO DO all the time.

What if I could just BE for a day…what would that be like?

P.S I know the title doesn't make sense...but I just like to play with your minds!!

“Oh dat is nooo gud”

My body has been in protest mode for a few weeks now, putting up several barricades in my way as I struggle to maintain my normal routines. I got a strange rash on my under-arms. Initially I thought that this might just be due to the fact that we have had our heater on on-stop, then I thought that perhaps I had changed a moisturiser or a deodorant etc, but it was none of these things. Though, I was convinced it was the dry skin thing for about 4 weeks, so for the last month I have been suffering in silence with my Sorbolene, Aveeno Cream and Paw Paw Ointment (not made on puppy paws but the fruit).

My parents always said to me when I was a kid and hurt myself, “Just slap some paw paw ointment on it!”. As kids we (my brothers and I) had paw paw for nappy rash, grazes, dryness, cuts, lip balm, every possible ailment on our exterior shells. So I have continues the tradition of spreading the word that paw paw ointment was the secret behind Jesus’ miracle healing. I do actually say it like this when I am preaching about the paw paw, just ask my friends, because paw paw ointment was invented by God himself didn’t you know that?! People were losing faith so he invented the paw paw ointment and then sent Jesus down to earth to apply it to every man, woman and child! Some say this is why he was able to walk on water, as the paw paw ointment created a strong oily seal between his feet and the water and he just glided along its surface! Seriously!

Back to the rash. My miracle ointment did not perform its duty, and I stopped believing in God! Once I got over the fact that my faith had been forsaken in the paw paw, I finally resided myself to the fact that I may have to go to the doctor and get it checked out. I went to the local doctors surgery and saw this funny little (I think Polish) man who was very kind and cheery, a little like santa. He said “Oh dat is nooo gud, we must get some steroid ointmunt onto dat! Dat looks like a fungal infecton to me, or perhaps an allergic reacton!” So he hooked me up with some steroid cream, and we decided to do a run of tests for general health while we were there, cause I just LOVE giant blood testing needles!

I actually managed to look over at the needle in my arm about half way through the test and watched the blood sucking out into the little tube. Which is quite an achievement for me considering last time I had a needle I passed out. On Thursday I go back to se Dr Hzrghlocski (not his real name, but I imagine you would pronounce it something like this), to get my test results, though I must keep using the steroid cream on the fungi/irritation until 7 days after symptoms have disappeared.

I had an interesting thought this morning whilst putting on the steroid cream, does this mean that due to increased steroids near my mammary’s that they will grow larger? Perhaps it’s wishful thinking.

Miss USA 2006-07-02

I am sitting on the couch on a Sunday afternoon (when I really should be working) watching the Miss USA competition. I must admit I love looking at gorgeous women, and judging them of course! Mmm a little evil you might think, but in reality that is exactly what this competition is about. These women are preening and training so that they can be judged over and over again.

Now sometimes looking at these gorgeous specimens can make us normal women feel horrible about ourselves, and our looks. But in reality these women employ a team of people to help them look like this, so it is unrealistic for us to compare ourselves with them. I actually love watching programmes like this it makes you realise that there are so many gorgeous women in the world, even though some of them have been preened beyond recognition.

I know your probably thinking that looks aren’t the be all and end all and I completely agree with you. Exterior beauty is only an element of what makes a woman gorgeous, inner beauty definitely shows through in a woman’s actions and her smile, in the end it’s definitely the things I have done and the decisions that I have made in my life that have made me who I am, and made me feel successful. So I suppose that is why I love watching programmes like this, trying to catch the inner beauty of these girls and trying to figure out if there is more underneath that exterior shell.

A lot of people I know suggest that competitions like this are a load of bolder dash. To a certain extent I think that they do have a negative effect on young women, all women. But on the other hand it is possible to take away positive things from a competition like this. We can feel assured that although these women are amazingly gorgeous, this doesn’t have to make us ladies feel bad about our looks. It can make us feel better about ourselves, that we are all gorgeous in our own way. That we manage to look, feel and do great things everyday whilst holding down jobs, studying, running business’, looking after our families and our partners, and being great friends to the other fabulous women around us. See we are all fabulous and gorgeous.

Maxtor My Baby

Yesterday my husband told me over msn that he had found the ultimate, the best, the most wicked external hard drive for me. He gave me all the details, I packed up my office gear so quick it was like I was Superwoman, and bunged myself into the car and off to Osborne Park. See, I get really excited when I can actually go and spend money, as these days we don’t really spend money on many things except bills and food (so basically nothing fun!). Except that after buying the hard drive I drove past Ikea and saw that they were having a sale and had to dart in for some storage bargains (that was fun!).

For anyone who knows me well, they will know that I am the organisation queen, the clean queen, essentially the “I am totally Anal” Queen (and that is totally non-sexual before anyone gets any ideas). When I see storage on sale I wet my pants with excitement! One of my girl friends called me two weeks ago from a new storage shop that she had discovered in Subiaco because she just had to let me know that she had found more of my storage crack and all was not lost. I didn’t want to admit it but when she called I got so excited that I peed a little.

So $82 dollars later, I had many different storage solutions for our house that I am looking forward to implementing room by room over the next few weeks. I found some $1.95 storage boxes and I couldn’t stop myself from filling half of my trolley with them. I was like a crazed Italian housewife in Woolies when she sees that the tinned tomatoes are on sale, just think of the opportunity for making bulk loads of Spaghetti Bog!! (Hang on a tic…that is totally something I would do)

So back to Maxtor My Baby! I am also anal with my backing up of files (oh boy, that sounded dodgy, keep it clean people). I have set up a backup of my entire laptop hard drive, so that if it has a hissy fit they can reboot from Maxtor My Baby! How awesome is that!

Happy 1st Day Birthday Maxtor My Baby!

P.S Happy New Financial Year (for tomorrow)

Bhuja Crisps

Last night when my husband and I arrived home there was a large box at our front door step, which turned out to be a belated wedding present from a group of people that he used to work with. We opened the box with excitement to find a truckload of goodies inside! Delicious snacks, oils, marmalades, coffee, beer, chocolates and many more yummy treats, all gourmet of course!

Our little eyes lit up with joy (mainly due to the fact that we were both starving and the exciting prospect of gorging ourselves on these gourmet snacks as opposed to having to cook dinner was on our minds). As we were fossicking through, I came across some funny crispy like biscuits, that kind of look like those little dried Japanese crackers, and they were called…wait for it…Bhuja Crisps! Now I know you are thinking “Whatever! They are just crisps!” But if you pronounce the crisps the way I like to pronounce them you get Boooyhaaa Crisps! Which in our ravenous state we found absolutely hilarious, so much so that we took photos of the Boooyhaaa Crisps, to preserve their memory of course!

Now you are thinking “Oh dear, you sad sad panda’s”, but look we are married, ok, this is like the most exciting thing that has happened to us all week! Haa haa, only kidding hon.

The Wedding Album

On the weekend my husband and I went to see our wedding photographer. It was amazing, his photos were beautiful, every single one of them. We spent four hours there, designing the album, whichwe have had to make much longer than originally intended. Which is going to cost us an absolute fortune! Literally, a fortune!

If we chop out some of the photos we risk losing a part of the story, which is how we have tried to put together the album, it captures moments in time throughout the story of our day. There is the toss-up of; do we spent the money and treasure these memories properly; or do we cut it down to save money and not really be happy with the final outcome?

We decided that you can’t put a price on memories. This was a really significant day for us and we want to be able to show our children how magical a day it was for us, and not forget those special moments that we had with each other and all of those that celebrated it with us.

Aaah love, marriage, money …memories. I loved our wedding day; I will always remember it with a smile on my face and warmth in my heart. I love you hubberoona.

Internet Drug / Eye Twitch

Have you ever had one of those moments where you think you might just burst into tears, in the middle of the office (or anywhere for that matter)? When you try to think positively, thinking, things cannot possibly get worse than this…and then they do?! Yesterday and this morning has been a huge collection of those moments!

I have gotten a lot better over the last few months in fixing technical computer mishaps, I have begun to understand a lot more about the processes involved, particularly when it comes to the setting up of airport networks, email accounts etc. (I know you are thinking “So what! I can build an f-ing computer”, but for me this new found knowledge has been a huge achievement). So on Tuesday the airport in my office chucked a sad, meaning that I could not access the Internet (something which I am addicted too, for both personal and professional reasons). I was too confused and tired on Tuesday to fix it, so yesterday I began the (so-called) easy task of following instructions and fixing the airport network. After trying every possible rule and solution to fix it I thought, “It’s ok, I’ll just wait till the owner of the airport comes in, she set it up, and her computer may be the one that needs to be used in order to fix these issues” (I sound calm enough here, but my eye had begun to twitch).

So the owner and I spent the next four hours or so going through the motions and trying to work out what the f**k was wrong with the d*mn airport. After this amount of time both of us had incessantly twitching eyes, and we looked at each other in bewilderment…and gave up. I went home and continued working from there, and when that Internet connected first time, by golly I felt like an addict after not being able to shoot up for several days (not that I know what that feels like, I am a good girl remember)

This morning I came into the office dismissing the fact that the airport even existed and plugged myself via Ethernet into a colleagues’ blessed router! Aaahh, that rush again, as the Internet started up and I got my daily fix of Dooce goodness. I am so excited about this automatic win with the Internet connection that I madly begin catching up on some emails, but they won’t send! I can receive, but I CAN’T SEND! (i.e. Sex and the City “She can reach me! But I can never reach her!) Then I realise, you silly girl, you have to enter all of the account details in the email in order to access it. So we did that and it didn’t work, we did all the right things and it didn’t work, we did EVERYTHING and it didn’t work. So I consulted my regular Nerdy types and they assisted me in a very efficient and helpful manner, and it STILL DIDN’T WORK!

By this time my eye is twitching so much that it may have fallen out, my eyes were welling up and I thought that I might never be able to send an email from my office again!

Then my colleague (a.k.a. genius of the email software) returned from his meeting and said, “Just delete that new email account you created and make a new one, that one has probably corrupted”…and…IT WORKED! Another Internet (not drug) induced rush!

I AM BACK! EMIAL AND INTERNET RETURNED! EYE TWITCHING, NO MORE!

msn 21.06.06

(A)
raah
almost had no work done today as the airport in freo in f**ked!!!
will have to work tonight to make up for it
am at home now
see you at 5:30pm

(B)
i thought u were trying to scare me

(A)
i was, did u jump??

(B)
it worked, i peed a little

(A)
lol, you got spare undies at work??

(B)
no i smell like pee now

(A)
eewwwwww
u want me to bring you some?? (lol)

(B)
nah, i am getting used to the smell

(A)
what about the boss??
has he looked at you funny yet??

(B)
nah, he can deal with it

(A)
he must have lost all senses in his nose already from your farty's

(B)
stfu b**ch

(A)
hee hee just kidding

(B)
bye

(A)
bye ?

Higgledy Piggledy

I don’t know about everyone else but I have certain experiences/things in my life that I react to in a very strong way. What I mean is, that after I do the dishes I have to wipe every part of my sink, bench and stovetop to remove any droplets of water. When the wind blows my hair in my mouth I have this knee-jerk reaction where I feel like I may vomit if I don’t get it out (AAH GET IT OUT!) If I see that the coffee table has the TV Guide and remotes just laying higgledy-piggledy, I have this underlying twitch that forces me to walk over and straighten it all up. I have the tendency to think that our house is a pigsty, and my husband looks at me, lift's an eyebrow, and says, “Are you kidding? It’s spotless!” If I stall the car at the traffic lights, I want to shrivel up into a peanut and hope that no-one saw that stupid woman, who after three years of driving, should be able to find the balance between her accelerator and clutch. Because I feel that after this amount of time I should be able to drive with absolute precision…mmm maybe I am a perfectionist…MAYBE??!!

I also tend to try and better the order in which I do things in the morning to optimise the time that I can spend in the shower and moisturise my entire body so that I don’t dry up like an old prune (I get very dry skin in the winter, not that everyone needed/wanted to know that).

So, the question is…am I OCD?! Or am I just like everyone else, who has their weird little rituals and phobia’s that help them get through the day?

Italian Guilt

This morning I was raring to go to the gym but woke up and my entire body was aching! How inconvenient! I was a revved up last night for this week, I packed my work bag, my gym bag, went to bed nice and early to get a great sleep, but my body has let me down. I was going to go into work late this morning as I couldn’t do the groceries on the weekend as I was setting up my Mother in-Law’s 50th, but after that I was going to roar down to Freo and get on with things. The gym? Well the alarm went off at 5:45am and I was going to head out to pump some iron (little irons). But...I could not move!

Bodies are funny things, and lately I have realised that I don’t really take care of mine as much as I should do, particularly when it comes to exercising and also relaxing. I don’t do enough quality exercise and I don’t do enough quality relaxing. The exercise thing I have no excuse for as I have a gym membership, and the gym really close to my house. The relaxing thing…well, that is the Italian guilt!

Let me explain…part of my Mum’s family is Italian and all of the women in her family seem to have this inability to slow down, relax, and let go of the fact that there is one speck of dust on the otherwise perfect hardwood floor. See, we all have a cleaning disorder! Not because we can’t clean, but because we can’t stop cleaning. I remember when I was a teenager I used to laugh as my Mum ran around cleaning her house like crazy before her mother came over (or the cleaner arrived) and now, I do the same thing when my mother comes round, or anyone else for that matter! If we eventually are satisfied with the cleaning we start with the sorting and the chucking out of junk. So we do have perfect homes, but no time to relax, or exercise.

I actually find my eye begins to twitch if I have a load of dirty dishes, or if I see a mark on the floor. But the killer for me is dust! I will one day be able to combat dust! But at the moment it is beating my head against the tile floor. I have tried wet cloths andnormal dusters, now I am onto those dusters that actually “grab” the dust. I also have electro-static dusting cloths that suck the dust into their clutches (and they smell like orange…mmmmm…orange)

So the above cleaning disorder, driven by Italian guilt (that your house is your temple and it should never be dirty) is the reason why I can’t relax, and possibly the reason that I am so achy today. As this weekend I experienced Italian guilt in my home and also in my in-laws home as I cleaned before the 50th party. Mmmm, perhaps I can have the Italian guilt exorcised out of me?

Rejection

You know it’s funny how one thing can bring you down from being so high and having a great day. When you are so convinced that something will turn out and then it doesn’t. I suppose I shouldn’t have such high expectations of every situation, but then I would become negative, but then again I would avoid disappointment. A catch 22?

I lost an opportunity to do a job because someone quoted less than my totally reasonable quote. I know that I would have done an excellent job, it would have been well researched and tightly designed, with great attention to detail. I also know that if someone quoted less than me (my quote was quite cheap in design standards) that they most definitely could not be doing the job properly. I only know this because they would have had to cut down on several elements of the process, either in research, concepts, design and refinements time. Which will mean that the client will probably end up with a sub-standard outcome. Which I think upsets me more than loosing the opportunity. The fact that the client, who is so passionate about this project, will end up with a dud, but won’t realise until it’s all too late and their project flops, or doesn’t thrive liked they dreamed.

Oh well, what can you do? Nothing…and hope that something else comes along to fill the hole where that project would have been.

Why do we have to schedule our p**ty tang? Because Australia is playing Japan honey!

Last night Australia played Japan in the World Cup, though I don’t know why I am pointing that out as everyone will inevitably know unless they had their head under a rock for the last week. It was a good game, but it didn’t go well for quite a while, and I was convinced that I would have a very grumpy husband to deal with after the game. It’s funny how an Australian team loss is somehow comparable to the funeral of a loved one, and a win means that everyone is more excited than if they were attending a wedding or birth of a child.

In last nights game there was much face contorting which I found hilarious, and much yelling at the screen and verbal encouragement of the guys, which I am sure they could hear all the way in Germany!! I always find it funny to l see/hear screen yellers. Do they realise that no one, except their soon to be deaf partners/housemates can hear them?

Luckily Australia came to the party at the end of the game and scored 3 goals in the last 8-10 minutes. Thankyou Tim Cahill you have saved me from grumpy husband disorder.

I used your head as a remote boat while you were sleeping

Last night my husband and I planned a nice evening together, we had a lovely meal at home, he gave me a shoulder massage and then we chilled on the couch and watched the World Cup. Generally I am not interested in watching any kind of sport, but the soccer is ok, and I especially enjoy looking at my husband’s contorted face when something goes wrong in the game or someone misses a close goal. I was so exhausted that after about 10 minutes of WorldCup goodness and face contortion I literally passed out, effectively turning our night together into a night where he watches sports and laughs at me dribbling in my sleep. You could say we are pretty comfortable with each other.

This made me think about all of the things that happen when you get too comfortable in a relationship, I think you know you have reached this stage when:
o You feel you can break wind in the presence of your lover.
o You are soaking their shirts in Napisan, and take pleasure at being able to get out the pit stains.
o You look forward to spending your Sunday night watching a DVD and getting through the large ironing pile made up of those same shirts.
o You get horny when you see your partner doing housework, because you are so excited that its happening (we will
re-address this topic at a later date)
o Your partner uses your head as a remote boat while you are passed out on the couch.

Aspergillus??

MSN Conversation (note this conversation has been edited to protect those partaking and those they were discussing)

Person A
There is something on the list called Faecal Occult Blood WTF???? What do you reckon that means???!!!!!

Person B
Ewewewew

Person A
Ya. Sick as a doggggggggg. Gonnnaaa vommmm

Person B
Ew

Person A
Did you know that it would cost you $86 to have poo tested !!
ffs
lol
Would you like an Aspergillus Check of the urine??
lol
It's like a different language !!

Person B
haa haa haa
ewwww

Person A
Aspergillus
Oh my god…this is killer…what a classic…under the reproduction section…there is a pregnancy test called
"Relaxin B*tch Pregnancy Test”!!!!!!!
rofl
I am tearing up, this is great.

Person B
Hahahaha
That's f**kin hilarious

Person A
lol

Glad to be back with his Wifemon

My husband arrived home last night about an hour late as his plane was delayed, and he looked happy but exhausted. He told me that he really missed his Wifemon (nickname for me based on Pokemon). It was so great to see him, I suppose you don’t realise how much you appreciate having someone around till they are gone. I know it’s pathetic, and that it was one night, but it felt weird, it was the first night we have spent apart since we got married.

It is great to have sleep hugs, which is actually what I missed the most. I think the Artist formerly known as Subby Hubby (alias; Lasagne Goddess), would have found it a bit strange if I cuddled up to her on Wednesday night like I do with him.

Aah the comfort of a strong relationship with someone is so relaxing for the soul.

My Subby Hubby and I

My husband has gone on his first business trip, only for two days and one night in the middle, but I figured that I should have a stand in Husband while he was gone. So one of my girlfriends stayed over last night, as my Subby Hubby. And I have got to say…the really hubby has a lot to live up to now!

We had a fantastic evening, of lasagne, wine, chats, girly movies. The lasagne was cooked up for me, and I am eating the leftovers now, and it is …well…divine! The wine was delicious and the instalment of Diane Keaton in The Family Stone was perfection.

Interesting. See, last night gave me a little of an idea of what it would be like to live with a woman, and although I am not attracted to women, the lifestyle I experienced yesterday evening is definitely something I could get used to. No offence to all the guys out there, but your attention to detail in the kitchen cleanliness department is generally not that crash hot, with a woman on the other hand my kitchen was left spotless. There were no crumbs left on the bench and no spots of water on the sink (it has to be spot free da*mnit!).

Mmm…how do you go about getting a guy to do all that without sounding like you are trying to change/nag him??

Haa haa I called it a BLOB

Haa haa I just realised that at the beginning of the last entry I called the blog a blob! See that's how unobservant I am with spelling, and I wrote a 44,000 words thesis!

666 & Got to get back into the rythym (spelling)

Firstly apologies about the possible misspelling above, after all I am a designer and I do normally just insert the content I am thrown. :) Also I don’t even know if there is misspelling there or not, that’s how crap I am at spelling.

I have been really quite slack when it has come to this blob lately, there have been many opportunities for entries but lets just say this, I couldn’t be a*sed logging on. It is a pity though as life is constantly full of funny little stories that I feel I should share, even though most likely, no one reads this.

We just had a long weekend here in Perth, thought being decidedly ignorant I have no idea what the public holiday is for. In fact I didn’t even know there was a public holiday on Monday, till last Friday. That’s jut how out of the loop I am with the big wide world. My “out of the loop-ness” draws from the fact that I now boycott the news on a regular basis, as (a) it has become to depressing and I often feel like shooting myself afterwards or having my tubes tied so as to not expose children to this world, and (b) I fee like the news has turned into a huge circus act of sensationalism, which only makes point (a) even worse.

The long weekend was lovely! Although we had so much time we did no housework. Though I did all of the washing, about a 50 tonne of ironing, the groceries, and we planted some rosemary along our front fence. The plants are really small, and we want them to grow into a hedge, but I have a feeling that it will take a good 5 years for this to happen, so we will just have to live with crappy little shrubs.

It is currently 3pm on Tuesday, and I appear to have reached my limit work wise, I feel like I have a long weekend hangover. All of that lazing around the house and sleeping in seems like a lifetime away as I sit here in the office in Fremantle. But don’t be fooled! I love my job and I love coming to work, but today I forgot my wallet (due to long weekend hangover) and since then I have felt all out of sorts, oooowwww and I just burnt my tongue on my coffee and almost choked on it. I just feel like I am living in a blur today.

Today also is the 6.6.06 and many people seemed to be concerned with this being D-day, the devil’s day. I am not much of a believer in mumbo jumbo like this, I tend to suppress being suspicious otherwise I would not sleep at night, and would imagine that there was a tiny devil creature dancing on my bed head. Every morning (actually every time I get in the car) I listen to Triple J Radio, and this morning they had people ringing up identifying parts of their morning which were consistent with the coming of the devil (all jokes of course but some good stories). One guy was driving behind a car with 666 as the number plate, there were many other stories, I believe that the devil stole my wallet and that’s why I had to bum $3.50 for parking of a stranger.

Am I turning into my Parents?

I am listening to ABC Classical FM for christs sake! The very same station that I used to cringe at when I was in high school, when all I wanted to do was listen to Triple J, which I do still listen to everyday. But I almost felt like today, in order to concentrate I needed some classical in the background.

This listening to classical music has become a more common occurence in my life over the last couple of years. Before then, the only classical I would listen to was when I was forced to when driving in my Dad's car, or when I was studying for my TEE exams, and thought that Mozart would increase my brain's ability to remember information (which didn't work out as well as I would have liked).

So does listening to classical occasionally make me a mega nerd, a person who appreciates the finer things in life, or even worse...am I turning into my parents???

P.S Oh, I must ring one of my girlfriends and organise our sowing night...aaaaahhhhh... hang on a tic, that's something my mother would say!!!!

Reclaiming garden beds, folding bed sheets and other interesting elements of married life

Well, it has been a while since the last post but I do have the excuse of a big white wedding. Well it wasn't that big, but it surely was white. :) We have been married for 6 weeks!! And I am are loving it, though alot of it doesn't feel any different, our routine is the same but something does feel more special. Almost as if there is a greater responsibility now to make things work, which I have always felt, but I kind of feel like I have been given a gift.

So life has been getting back to normal, and we have thrown ourselves back into work and life in general, and on Sunday I well and truly threw myself in the deep end. I decided that a small garden tidy up was to become a Backyard Blitz (except in the front yard) and set about reclaiming my garden beds, from their covering of weeds and grass that has decided that the garden bed is a better place to grow than the actual lawn (which often looks more like a sandpit). The garden looked fantastic! The husband and I even ecitedly decided that we should plant some rosemary and grow it into a hedge along the front fence, (something that will inevitably be a dream, or will happen and then we wil proceed to kill the rosemary through our ignorance of the need to water plants). So all was well in the little garden with the blue picket fence, but the next morning all was not well inside the little house with the blue picket fence!

"I CAN'T MOVE!!"
"What do you mean you can't move?"
"I mean I CAN'T MOVE!"

My muscles were so strained from all of the blitzing that my legs, arms and upper body (effectively my whole body) had seized up. I was dragged to the shower where I melted my muscles and then carried on with my day, as per normal, despite the fact that when I walked, I looked like a teenage girl wearing jeans that are waaayyy too tight. :)

Today I am a little better, went to the gym to ensure there was no further seizing up of the muscles and stretched forever!

Still walking like a teenage girl who is wearing jeans that are waaaayyy to tight...also just washed my jeans, and they are waaaaayyy to tight, so the effect is double, quite hilarious really.

Hormonal?

I have had a Sh*tter of a morning.

There was no milk left and no coffee (I repeat NO COFFEE!)!!! I made the fiancee late for work, because I could not choose the right jacket! I spilt coffee on the carpet. I put on pants that were too long and hence stood on them all the way from the carpark to the office. I wore sh*t shoes that have floppy heel bits that I keep standing on (so combined with the long pants, when I walk I look like one of my legs is shorter, or a sped (apologies for the lack of political correctness here, but I am emotional dammit!) as I try to walk without letting the shoes fall off my heels where I will then stand on the heel again and look like more of a sped). Then I dropped the keys at the foot of the office door, after my shoulders were almost falling of from carrying my laptop, 2 litres of milk, 500g of coffee, my lunch box, and (cover your ears coffee lovers) black instant coffee in a thermos cup (that's right instant coffee, I was that desperate to improve my morning).

You want more??

Feeling a little more relieved now, have had real coffee, have read my daily installment of dooce.com, and have answered my emails. It took me until now to realise that this morning was the effect of hormones, I am almost positive! This realisation came about when I wrote an email to my Uncle, who is currently in Japan, as I had heard he may not be able to make it back in time for our wedding. :( I was devastated, he is the only of my Uncle's that lives in Perth, my favourite uncle, we are really close, and I got all teary when I was writing him an email.

Sooo yeah you could say I am a little emotional, so you know what that means, tomorrow there will be a visit from Crampy McCramps, and then the time of the month where I just want to shower for 5/6 days straight.

Oh, the joy of being a woman!

Daily Morning Coffee Bog

Now, I know this may be a bit of a sensitive subject for some, but I think that it is a phenomenon which extends beyond my humble bathroom behaviour. The morning coffee bog, I think, is something that happens to many of us coffee drinkers, and that we don't really like to admit to it. :)

Every morning we suck down our couple of cups of caffiene and then after an hour or so we are running to the loo with much haste, we have all of a sudden been taken over by the incredible urge to s**t. It is so horrible, even your own nose begins to shrink and try to retreat back inside your head. I wonder what it is about the coffee that makes us do this, and why we continue to drink coffee, even though we know it makes us do this??

The fiance told me many times that in his old office he sometimes couldn't step foot into the bathroom after about 10am, as the entire office had just gone to perform their ritualistic coffee bogs. How gross!!! This is how I know that I am not alone. He reckons that these people don't have enough fibre in their diet and this is why. But I am not so sure because he thinks this doesn't happen to him, yet we both eat the same foods and I have a ritualistic coffee bog daily. Unless he is ashamed of his daily coffee bog! Oh my god, he is a closet coffee bogger!! Haa haa.

For thos who are not Australian and haven't picked up what a bog is...it's an Aussie word for the loo, or sometimes what you do in the loo. There are many kinds of bogs, the After Grog Bog (ABG) and the newly invented Morning Coffee Bog (MCB). Are there any more I wonder??

This topic is Doctor Karl worthy I think! What is with the MCB??

Guilt about Working from Home

So these days I feel guilty quit alot about my new working situation.

I think it is because I am enjoying myself so much! I get to be a lot more relaxed about my working hours, I can work later, earlier, on the weekends if I want to have some time off during the week, but I still get all of my work done. So really there is nothing to feel guilty about.

I think it is because I have been so well trained in the beleif that the normal working week, 9am to 5pm Monday to Friday is how it should work. But in reality there are many people who don't work that way and do very well for themselves!

Maybe it will take a little while for the guilt to pass, and for me to get used to this fairly new arrangement. :)

Dirty Hangman at Cottosloe Beach

After a fantastic brekkie at Sassy's on the Swan with the ladies, which had us talking mostly about babies and marriage (how scary, we are offically old!), two of my fantastic girlfriends (and bridesmaids) and I went to Cottosloe Beach to bask in the late afternoon sun. We of course were wearing sunscreen, after all we are responsible, and old, and trying to preserve our skin! Ok we are not old, we are only 23-24, which is actually young. :)

So at the beach we chose a great piece of Cottosloe grass, suncream-ed and settled into a few hours of relaxing and chatting. It all started off well, until one of the lovely ladies looked up towards the large limestone wall and was greeted by a man (of around 40) with short short short loose loose loose shorts on, and a little suprise hanging out (if you know what I mean). It was horrifying, and really embarrassing for us, and well...him, except that he had no idea he was showing the world his goodies. As one of the girls said, it is like a car accident, you know you don't want to look, but you just have to. For the whole 2.5 hours we kept finding ourselves looking, periodically, even though we didn't want to! D**n that human need to look at things you're not supposed to.

It gets better, the couple next to us were getting very friendly with each other, and they were both wearing bikini's. Our partners would have killed to be there! What is it with men and l**b**ns?

And now comes the sad part, there was a really pretty young girl leaning against the earlier mentioned limestone wall, who was sniffing paint fumes out of a drink bottle. It was heart breaking to see. All alone, and after a few hours of it she didn't even hide it as she was so out of it. What can you do in a situation like that? You can't very well go up to her an confiscate the bottle and spray paint, and there was no one of authority there that we could tell, no cops and the lifeguards were long gone. It was horrible, and I know all three of us haven't been able to get that vision of her laying on the grass out of our heads. :(

Well after that sad note, we did manage to keep our spirits up with a few rounds of raunchy hangman, haa haa I haven't played hangman since I was in primary school (with decidedly less raunch factor)! :) Oh dear, the immaturity! :)

Damn those Nitpicking Genes

I don't know about other women, but I have this unbeleivable fascination with nitpicking, which is completely subconscious. I wish I could stop doing it, as the fiancee has a shitty and closes down whenever I do it and my conscious mind doesn't want to expose him to the wrath that is nitpicking. And I know that it is bad, but it must be a genetic disposition in all of the women in my family. Damn those Nitpicking Genes!

I know that I am capable of controlling my subconsious and crazy nitpicking genes, but it does require a lot of concentration!

The stupid thing is that often the nitpick is not even about something that actually happened or didn't happen, its like my brain just invents subjects to nit pick about. The reason I am writing about this is that after some un-ruly nitpicking last night, my fiancee blew his lid (understandably) as the thing I had nitpicked about was one of the said imaginary situations. And now he is still shitty at me, I can't stand it when people are angry at me, I hate it, it makes me squirm. I always want to grab the nitpick out of the air and shove it back in my mouth before it gets within his earshot. But unfortunately I cannot move at the speed of sound.

Somebody help me to stop nitpicking, and just let real and imaginary things go! Because really, in the larger scheme of things I know that the small stuff doesn't matter.

Feeling a little over-whelmed?

Last night I went to an AGDA (Australian Graphic Design Association) Function. It was about micro businesses, or small business with 1-3 people in them. It was choka-block full of interesting information, experiences and projects by three designers who ran Micro design business'.

I walked out feeling so inspired, and so in awe of what they had been able to achieve by themselves! I also walked out feeling like I had so much to live up to! So many people have told me that I have what it takes to make this work, even senior designers have, but there is always this lingering feeling inside of "What the hell are you doing starting your own business?!" and "Are you a nutter?!"

One of the speakers even indicated that you have to be a bit of a nutter to take take a chance and start your own business, so I guess that I am definitley a nutter. So yeah, I am feeling a little over-whelmed. I am almost looking forward to the Wedding being over so I can concentrate on building this business properly and have time to get into the nitty gritty details of it all. :)

The Pizza Box that Just Won't Let Go

A few weeks ago the fiancee and I ordered Pizza Hut, which although we normally avoid we ended up having to order as all of the other good pizza shops were unavailable. So after eating it, and feeling terribly sick from the grease afterwards we disposed of our pizza box responsibly into the recycling bin.

A few days later the recycling went out, and all was emptied except the pizza box which was clinging to the bottom of the recycling bin. So the pizza box went out again this week in the recycling bin, and yet again the box remained! Now I know what you are thinking...'the box is stuck to the bottom with grease, or wedged in there'. But it's not, I checked and shifted it around!

So my story (and I'm sticking to it) is that the pizza box is either in love with us and/or our recycling bin, or that it is sitting there as a reminder of the unbeleivable bloating that was felt by the two of us after eating it, teaching us that Pizza Hut, no matter how hungry you are, is not worth the bloating.

Its like Eddie Murphy says about the chunk of sh*t in his 80's comedy routine Raw, "What does that chunk want?"

"Hey you...pizza box...what do you want!!"

Wine, Spaghetti and Freezer Defrosting

Last Sunday one of my closest and dearest girlfriends returned from overseas, she has been a travelling mirage for 9 and a half months, and I have missed her almost uncontrollably. Whenever I was falling apart I knew I could count on her and she knew she could count on me. She is fabulous, gorgeous, kind, caring, supportive and I know that she has my back in any situation.

We had a lovely Friday evening of wine, spaghetti, long chats and freezer defrosting. See, I can count on this amazing woman to have my back on EVERY occasion, including freezer defrosting! My fiancee was digging at the ice at the front of our freezer that was preventing us from shutting it, when she stepped in with the egg flipper and the tenacity of an ice mountain climber. In fifteen minutes flat my freezer was a 3/4 bigger, and I could fit all of my fish, crumpets, mince meat and steak into the freezer with no troubles what-so-ever. :)

Like I said, she is the gal who always has my back, she's the egg flipper in my freezer! :) (mmm that sounds kinky!)

Bomb Threats and Vogue

I was sitting in my office this afternoon, innocently working away, when all of these cops rocked up out the front of my building. I work in Fremantle, so at first I thought someone had been broken into. But to my suprise they came to my office door and told me to get out of the building as there had been a bomb threat!

I just closed up my laptop (which contains my entire life!) and grabbed my handbag and I was outta there! I looked around before I left at all of the lovely design books that would be soon to be exploded and tried to think of how I could get them all out of the building in 3 minutes. Unfortunatley I had to leave all of those lovingly crafted books and do a runner. :(

The police blocked off the whole street and evacuated everyone, and we found out eventually that someone had called the transport company downstairs from us, told them there was a bomb in the building and that we had 30 minutes to get out!

On the upside, nothing ended up exploding, so all the lovely design books are safe and sound. I spent a couple of hours outside on the street with my laptop, and when that ran out of batteries, I went and bought a Vogue magazine. When spending time evacutated from your office reading Vogue has a good calming effect I find. :)

So now I am sitting in the office hoping that the phone rings again, so I can go back to the grass and finish Vogue! Just kidding! ;)

Seperated Parents

Isn't it funny how being a kid in a broken home never really leaves you, and you never really get to stop dealing with it day to day. I know you just have to get over it amd move on, but boy, when it crops up it really knocks you around emotionally, just as much as it did when the s**t first hit the fan.

With my parents it always comes down to money, and it sucks because no matter how much you try to avoid it, you always end up getting stuck in the middle. You find yourseld defending each of your parents to each of them, and creating a web of bullshit to justify each of their actions, when all you want to do is say "F**k it, you guys deal with it, I don't want to know about it!" Unfortunately it can't work like that, particularly when you are planning a wedding that parents are helping pay for. Which is so much of a help, and you really appreciate it, but at the same time you almost wish that you didn't have to ask them for money, because you know that one of them or you is going to end up in tears about it.

Fun fun! Interesting how the kids don't get a choice in the seperation, but they are the ones worst affected by it. The parents always have someone to hate and blame (each others) and the kids...well they have no one to blame...so they blame themselves.

Prying my eyes open with Coffee

I have discovered that there is an exact formula to me waking up in the morning, the most important of which is coffee. I foolishly thought I could make it this morning without coffee and now it is 10:30am and I have had to make myself a delicious cup. :)

My morning formula includes; a shake from my fiancee "the alarm has gone off, get up!", then rolling out of bed into the shower, peanut butter toast, then coffee (sweeeeeet coffee). I am addict, just like so many other millions in this world. I am a fan of the flat white, no suger please! There is only a requirement for sugar with me if I am having a short black/espresso. I haven't quite worked myself up to being able to chug a short black with out a solitary teaspoon of sugar.

My mum took me overseas for my 21st present and we spent 2 weeks in Italy and 1 week in France. We loved the coffee in Italy, the cafe's were a combo with the bakery, so you could get some pastry goodness and a fantastic short black. They actually call a cappucino an American Coffee, as it is not a regular coffee in Italy. So in our effort to live the culture of Italy we chugged out short blacks daily (with a hidden sugar).

My first Bridal Flip-out

Last week, I got decidedly emotional over some paper and envelopes, and place cards. I think that this was my first bridal flip-out, and boy it must have looked funny to everyone but me. I don't know how my fiancee kept a straight face when he got into the car and I started bawling, about paper! The fact of the matter is that the paper was fine, it looks great! But it wasn't what I had exactly envisioned and the paper lady was a total bitch to me, so that didn't help my emotional state. My fiancee had to drive the car home because I couldn't see through the tears.

Then on the weekend, said paper would not work through the laser printer, putting us a day back in sending out the invites. :( Not happy Jan! But at least my fiancee was there as a calming influence, he sorted a company to print them out for us and guillotine them for $16! He is my hero :)

Traffic Light Conspiracy

Today I fell victim to the famous Traffic Light Conspiracy! Where you have to drive from Victoria Park to Fremantle down Canning Highway (one really long road) and you get every single red light! I have never had an experience that bad before with the Traffic Light Conspiracy, most of the time it let's you get at least one or two green lights, but OH NO, not today. Today my 20 mijnute trio turned into a 40 minute trip, that is a total of 20 extra minutes spent waiting at traffic lights. :(

Damn you traffic lights, YOU WILL NOT BREAK MY SPIRIT!

Alone in the World

Alone in the world of design! I am officially un-employed! Well self-employed, which in this town means un-employed. Fun fun!! I am already flat out with work which is great, but I am also really concerned about being able to make enough money, and provide enough for the life that me anf my fiancee live. I don't think he is as worried as I am though, as he seems to believe that I can do this, and I probably can, but hey sometimes I find it all too hard to beleive. :)

Today my best friend and I went to the pub and finished off a bottle of white wine and had a great chat, about the realities of life and love and relationships. Which is fairly regular apparently as two sisters on the table next to us were doing the same thing! I just love how easily that women can read other women, it's great! We can read other women so well, tell by their body language and the way that they look at their girlfriends. Just from reading our neighboring table we ended up having the best chat ever with these fabulous women. One of them is getting married next weekend, and the other (her sister) has just come over from Sydney for the wedding. The sister suspects that her boyfriend in Sydney is cheating on her, so she is flying home tonight to see him, and hopefully catch him out!! Increadible, how kick ass is that! I suppose that you cannot tell alot about a woman when you have just met her, but this lady was lovley, and gorgeous and had a sparkling personality. what was this guy thinking!!

What a depressing day

Do you ever have a day when you think that you will bever make it to the end with an outcome that is required of you? Today was one of those days, I came home feeling like a total failure all because I couldn't design a logo properly, because it was a caricature. And I of course cannot draw people to save my life, unless they are immensley stylised or naked women (life drawing) in charcoal or pastels. Imagine being a designer who can't draw cartoons and caricatures, well that is me. I can draw many other things, in fact most other things. But as the Fiancee has said, it is impossible to be perfect at everything. :) Wise words :)

The thing that shocked me the most about today, is how useless I felt by the end of the day, like my life was going to end or something. I just can't stand the idea of failing at solving a design problem, or not being able to come up with a perfect or even good outcome. I have never felt so horrible, I felt worse even than when I had been through a break-up. Maybe because I couldn't use my talent to conquer a problem, something I have alwayd been able to do.

So tomorrow is Valentine's Day and I hope to solve the problem that I was unable to solve today, otherwise, tomorrow i will be feeling just as dejected as I do now :(

Invasion of Hairy Black Worms

A friend of mine has been invaded my crazy little black worms that are trying to desecrate a tree in her front yard. They are spreading all throughout her garden, and they are absolutely disgusting!!

Then the other day I walked out the back of my house and I saw a single furry black worm! Then and few hours later they were everywhere, invading my yard, and threatening all of my lovely plants! Aaaah! When I see them I can't help but shudder, I am not sure why, as I have never had such a negative reaction to bugs before. Living in Australia bugs kinda become part of your existence. But these worms...well lets just say I can't handle them.

So the fiance and I went on a mission to locate the beastly shrub that was attracting the worms and get rid of it, in the hope of removing out little worm problem. So after removing said shrub, we thought "Great! Crisis overted!" But we are still being invaded, everytime I go outside I have to Baygon the suckers, and I feel really guilty everytime, even though I don't like them. Cause when you Baygon them they wriggle and squirm :( It makes my teeth feel funny just thinking about it, like when you see/hear someone run their fingers down a black board.

My soon to be sister in law has been over, and I have left the bug spraying to her. You go kick ass girl! Get those wormy's! But don't show them to me :( I don't wanna see them!

Let It Be...

Sometimes I feel like life is all too hard! Living up to my own expectations is almost impossible, and I just wish that I didn't put everything on such a high pedestal that was so far out of my reach. I am sure others feel the same, that they can't understand why they can't have the perfect life, the perfect job, the perfect relationship, and the perfect family and friends. I just want to know when I will be happy to accept that things are always less than perfect, and that in the reality of this world perfect is not reality. I am longing for the day when I can be happy with the less than perfect, and realise that I actually like less than perfect, because that is what is real and fun.

I often feel like when one thing goes wrong in my day that it is ruined from then on. I know this sounds pathetic, but I very often find myself close to tears when something goes wrong that is out of my control, cause I will then know that my perfect day was ruined! So am I a phsyco for feeling this way? Am I an emotional wreck of a human being that needs to just chill out? Or am I just normal? Does everyone feel like this?

When will I learn to be happy with the way that things are, and just let it be...

Resignation

So I officially resigned last week, so after 3 or so weeks I will be self employed. Kinda scary, which I think I mentioned in my last entry. My boss was kinda disappointed, which is understandable because I am a SH*T Hot designer! Haa haa, not really...

So I am currently run off my feet, trying to organise the new job, the finishing of the old job, and the organising of the wedding.

And speaking of the wedding, I popped over to see my mum tonight and she told me that she had organised the week off the week before the wedding to help me with the last minute things, and that also she wanted to offer any help she could give but that she didn't want to be a controlling mother of the bride. It was a really great moment, and one of those where you realise that, sh*t my parents are amazing! I haven't always praised my mum as much as I posibly should have, and this moment really confirmed for me yet again that she is, the best mum in the world, to me. :)

Resignation

So I officially resigned last week, so after 3 or so weeks I will be self employed. Kinda scary, which I think I mentioned in my last entry. My boss was kinda disappointed, which is understandable because I am a SH*T Hot designer! Haa haa, not really...

So I am currently run off my feet, trying to organise the new job, the finishing of the old job, and the organising of the wedding.

And speaking of the wedding, I popped over to see my mum tonight and she told me that she had organised the week off the week before the wedding to help me with the last minute things, and that also she wanted to offer any help she could give but that she didn't want to be a controlling mother of the bride. It was a really great moment, and one of those where you realise that, sh*t my parents are amazing! I haven't always praised my mum as much as I posibly should have, and this moment really confirmed for me yet again that she is, the best mum in the world, to me. :)

Slacker that Quit

Well I have been a slacker with this blog recently :) Life has been a little intense, to say the least :) I have decided to leave my job and move on to a better opportunity for growth in Fremantle, working with three of my design mentors and also working for myself. I am terrified and excited at the same time, I am so scared of not earning enough or not being prepared. :) But I am so excited that I will be involved with such experienced and inspired people. :)

I am also a little proud of myself, that I have been able to grow a backbone and do something ultra risky. Though I probably should give myself more credit, I have done some pretty risky things in the past, but they have always paid off, and I am definitley commited enough to pull this out on my own thing off. I am just worried that I won't be able to keep my income consistent enough.

I feel like there is so much to think about right now, the planning for the move to Freo, the wedding, and just keeping up with life in general. It's funny that I seem to do all of this to myself all at once, rather than space all my big moves and plans.

Exhaustion

I feel totally zonked almost like someone has slipped me a sleeping tablet. This week has been so busy, I didn't even realise it was Friday today, it had gone so quickly. But then again it does feel like an age since the last weekend.

I have had one of those pounding skull aches, that seems to encompass your entire skull, and it patricularly strong near the crown of your head. Its not a migraine, more of a headache. I do get migraines though, they are horrible. They really slay me completely when they crop up. I can't open my eyes, can't seem to get my balance, can't stand light at all, and feel incredibly woozy, whilst all the time feeling like one of my eyes it being stabbed with a dagger. Fun! Fun!

The only thing that sorts a migraine is a Panadiene Forte and a good rest. Which is what I am going to do right now at 9pm on a Friday night :) I am officially OLD!

Till Death do us Part!

Such a statement full of bullshit pressure, unless you know for sure in your heart that its forever. But how do you know it's forever? And how do you know it's not forever?

I have had a few loves in my life, probably one or two before my fiancee that were more than crushes, and even though I was in the moment and I loved these guys, somewhere deep inside I knew that it wasn't forever. Marriage and that kind of commitment never came up, not only because I was quite young, but also I didn't see it was possible with those other guys.

The funny thing is now, even though I know for sure in my heart that I want to spend the rest of my life with my fiancee (soon to be husband), there are occasional momentary doubts. These doubts make me feel horrible and guilty. "Sh*t! What am I doing having doubts, I love him?!"

I suppose everyone occasionally has doubts about their relationships, and they really only become a concern when they come around too much. Maybe my fiancee has doubts about us too? Like when I blow a shit load of cash on sandals, clothes, or face creams, maybe he thinks "What the f*ck! How can she spend so much money on this stuff? Do I really want to marry this girl?"

So sometimes there are doubts, and I suppose the most stable relationships have them, I suppose it's human nature. But my doubts are wiped clean when I see him, think about hugs on the couch, jokes and giggles, morning hugs, the comfort of his warmth when I am upset and lost, and our moments of deep connection. This is when all of the doubts...well...they just float away.

Sooky la la, I know, but look isn't it this kind of deep connection with another person that we all crave? Yeah...I thought so! So stop eye-rolling!

Sheets Glorious Sheets!

Sheets...Glorious...Sheets!

I love a freshly made bed! I always have to have shower at night before I get into a freshly made bed, despite the fact that I am generally a morning shower kinda gal. Clean sheets seem so precious, and crisp and...well...clean that you don't want to ruin them by sleeping in them. Also you know that you can never be bothered tucking in that top sheet all neat and tidy with hospital corners after the first night of rest, and that you will just pull the doona over to hide the bed, because you can't be a*sed making the bed properly.

Apart from the clean bed linen, I think that I have had THE most glorious weekend ever (well, so far anyway)! Apart from the fact that it is the first weekend since I have been back at work (which does help ALOT!), I have just felt totally chilled out and have done everything I have wanted.

Friday evening I laid on the couch, did my dishes and two loads of wash, and watched Kindegarten Cop. I know this may souds pathetic, but it was just what I needed! Before this, the fiancee and I stood out on the street with the neighbours had an alchoholic beverage, watered our lawns and caught up on neighbourly gossip...fabulous!

This morning I slept in, had a coffee in my great antique chair in my back yard, and then prepped myself for some grocery shopping with a girlfriend. Again...I am hearing the groans over the cables...but it was great and COOL! Unless you have experienced a 37 degree humid day in Perth, you will never appreciate the heaven that is...the shopping centre!

Then I came home, had a delish sausage roll and prepped for the beach! My girlfriend picked me up, we grabbed some take-away coffees and headed down to Cottosloe Beach, heaven on a stick in weather like this. And let me tell you the difference in temperature between the subhurbs and the coast is AMAZING! We sat on the grassy hill above the beach, under the pine trees, and talked...for 3 and a half hours. And occasionally perved (just a little) on the extraordinary amount of cute guys present. (Now remember coupled girls, "You can get your appetite anywhere, but you can only eat at home!") The breeze was, well, exquisite! There is no other word for it, I had the best time ever! Though we found ourselves perving more at little babies, than boys, mmmm is this a sign of us getting older and cluckier?? Oh dear!!!

We finished the evening off, with some peppermint foot bomb soaks, moisturiser and socks, champayne, and last (but definitley not least) Sex and the City!

What a B-E-A-utiful day! (In the immortal words of Jim Carrey, though he isn't dead)

Parking Inspectors Stalking Me

This week was the first week back at work for most of us here in Perth, and the parking inspectors have been out in full force. Sometimes I think they receive some guilty pleasure from giving people tickets, and the fact that people are mostly terrified of them. I believe that they have been stalking me this week, because everytime I have tried to sneak onto the side of the road to drop off the fiancee or pick him up, they are all of a sudden behind me, or in front of me, or next to me, or worse jumping out of their cars and stomping over the road towards me! So I have been shoving the fiancee in and out of the car all week, trying to push him out the door and take off so I don't get booked, or worse berated. Consequently we have been smashing our heads together instead of our usual peck on the mouth, in the rush to get him out of the car.

The most stupid I felt all week is when I told a parking inspector, after he had stomped over the road towards me, that I had no idea that I was standing in a hotel bus stand. Even though I stop there everyday to wait for the fiancee to come out of the building. I felt horrible after I drove away, guilty that I had lied to the guy, even though it possibly saved me a ticket. I don't know why he bought it, maybe it was because I said I would move right away, or maybe it was because he couldn't be bothered, or maybe he already had my licence number and I will receive a nasty letter in the post.

Boy was he angry though!! I think that is a pre-requisite for being a parking inspector, that or they just get sick of all the lame excuses that they get.

Natural and Not so Natural Disasters

It is interesting, I don't know if I wasn't paying attention to the news about 2-3 years back, because I never remembered the world being such a scary place. The past few years we have all been exposed to terrorism, earthquakes, bombings, wars, tsunami's and now a land slide in Indonesia. Maybe I didn't see it at first, because terrorism was never covered by western media. I suppose they though that it didn't effect us and that's why we needed to know about it. In a way I am glad that more and more of these un-natural disasters are brought to the world's attention. However what bothers me is the way the the media goes crazy when something bad happens in a western country, but doesn't place much (if any) emphasis on horrible things happening in less fortunate and/or eastern countries. Even here in Australia, when we are so close the Asia, our media seems only to be concerned with America, Britain and mainland Europe (and even Europe doesn't get much of a shoe in).

I must apologise to media groups like the ABC and SBS, who seem to be the only unbiased media groups in the country! Are we becoming like America? Where the media is so restrictive in the information it gives to the population, that many people there don't seem to realise what happens outside their border? I don't know if this bothers anyone else, but censorship is a big issue these days, and I think it is becoming a big issue for Australia and it's media.

Narrow reporting...does it control your life?

Blink

Blink...a decision that you can make in a matter of seconds, that can mean more than a decision made through extensive analysis.

I am reading a very interesting book at the moment called Blink, "The Power of Thinking Without Thinking" Now I know what you are thinking, that this is some self help book. But it isn't. It is effectivley a scientific and phsycological analysis by Malcolm Gladwell. The book discusses the way that we humans can make accurate decisions in seconds whether with our conscious or unconscious minds. It is really amazing! The human mind is an amazing thing, and our own brains are consistently doing think that we do not even realise it is doing.

For example, dreams are supposed to be a good example of how our unconscious mind influences us. For those of us who can remember our dreams, do you ever wake up and think "S**t! I didn't even see anything in my entire life that would provoke a dream like this?" The reality is that your unconscious mind probably did absorb many elements that your conscious mind didn't register.

The book explores how people can sub-consciously react to things and how these reactions can be measured and interpreted by scientists to read peoples real feeling about a situation before their conscious mind even realises they have reacted. The amazing thing for me is that our subconscious is effectively affecting the decisions we make and how we live our lives without us even consciously realising! Scary huh?!

So get Blink and read it...you will be amazed. :)

Back to Work Blues

Well a Happy New Year to all! Hope everyone had a good one.

Today was the first day back at work after a divine week and a half off for the Xmas and New Year break. We decided to do nothing this holidays and simply relax, sleep in and rejuvenate. It was lovely, I even managed to get to the beach during the week, despite the unusually cool December we have been having here in "sunny and hot Perth".

Being back at work felt strange, but also routine. I just kind of slipped right back into it, the only thing I couldn't quite manage was the gym. The thought of getting up at 6am after my holiday of at least 10am sleep in's was just too hard to handle. So today was 7am and tomorrow will be 6am, we will just ease ourselves back into it.

Despite having to get up so d**n early, I actually really enjoy going the gym in the morning, you almost feel like when you get to work, you have already achieved so much, which really spurs you on. It wakes you up, it's the "me" time in my day where I can play my music and just think, without the interuption of the demanding client, the email, the crappy work computer crashing, the washing, ironing, cooking, driving in traffic. Oh dear, now I am back at work I have to deal with all of that cr*p again!

Despite feeling like it was wrong to be at work today when all of the surrounding cafe's, deli's and offices were closed, I actually got an awful lot of work done, it was extremely productive. Back into the daily grind, and for everyone still on holiday, enjoy it while it lasts! I had a friend get on msn today and ask me if I knew a hair dresser, she was set for a day being pampered and hanging at her local cafe...b**ch!! Hee hee.